Have you considered yet another intellectual path, that of Secular Theism? It’s actually quite amusing because it turns atheism against itself by showing a perfectly plausible means for a God or many gods to have evolved over the course of eternity. Indeed it becomes absurd for it not to have happened given current knowledge of evolutionary forces simply applied on a more cosmic scale. Anyway, I wrote it all up here: https://peter-mcclard.medium.com/theolution-how-god-evolved-4c7cc845bcea